LENT 2020
When the world changed I did not want to give up giving up:
liquorice torpedos, Nan’s parkin,
brownies cut exact by weight, fizzy rainbows
dolly mix, my best mate’s pecan coffee cake,
hot chocolate, chocolate, squares of dark, good stuff,
plus Crunchies, Buenos, Reese’s cups.
Weeks at work, dodging the office biscuit tin,
replacing that with fruit and nuts and cups of tea
for what? To show I could.
Halfway through and things got bad: the fearful
buying of eggs, spaghetti, flour, the stocking up, the locking in
long days spent with stocks of sweets and little wine
and no sex. Advised to let the sun come through but not
go out. Police cars, phonecalls distant as the moon
but ten minutes away: How can you make memories
in this? This fast is a giving up of days.
I decide then, whatever years lay ahead,
I know I will not test myself again.
LYDIA ALLISON
Also by Lydia,